Panic Attack

I don't have panic attacks- not like the ones you think of when you think of panic attacks, the whole not being able to breathe, blowing into a paper bag, tears streaming thing. I don't have panic attacks like that. So, I said, I don't have panic attacks.

It's taken me years to realise and understand that that is not the only form of panic attack.

According to Google, a panic attack is 'a sudden and overwhelming feeling of acute and disabling anxiety'.

I have lots of sudden and overwhelming feelings of acute and disabling anxiety. Maybe I do have panic attacks.

Sometimes, it is feeling like I am going to die. Sometimes, it is getting fixated on one 'worry'. Sometimes, it feels like I'm being sucked into a black hole, all darkness. Sometimes, I just want to run away. Sometimes, I have to grab onto something, or dig my hands into my palms, to remind myself that I am real and not slipping away. Sometimes, it is feeling like I can't breathe, even though I can. Sometimes, it is just feeling sudden and overwhelming feelings of acute and disabling anxiety, in a way I can't describe.

Sometimes, it is all of the above, and sometimes, it is completely different.

Sometimes, other people can tell I'm having a panic attack; sometimes, it's obvious that something is not okay. Often, it's impossible to tell. I have sat in lessons and had panic attacks, completely unnoticed. That's no one's fault. It's just a point to demonstrate, that panic attacks are not always what you think because of the way they're portrayed.

A panic attack is a sudden and overwhelming feeling of acute and disabling anxiety.